The Best Things:


1) "I gave it to you already! What, did you lose it or something?"
2) "What's with all the questions all of a sudden?"
3) "I have had enough!" (And then leave the room)
4) "Oh yes, that homework, hmm, there's an interesting story behind that." (Then ignore your teacher completely)
5 "What do you want from me? Blood?!?"
6) "So it's the 'where is your homework' game we're playing"
7) "I spilt water on it, and thought you wouldn't want it anymore, so I threw it out"
8) "Well, that homework, suffered an, unfortunate fate" (And then laugh maniacally)
9) "You know what? I think you should do my homework! It's an invasion of my privacy"
10) "You want my homework huh? Well guess what? I didn't do it? What are ya gonna do? Cry?"

The Best and Worst things to say to a Cop when you are pulled over for a ticket

The Best Things:

1) Oh I'm sorry, how many Donuts do I owe you?
2) Isn't being a Cop kinda like a power trip?
3) Nothing get's past you does it?
4) Why are you picking me out of all this lot? We're all speeding fool!
5) You know what? You can keep that ticket, I don't want it
6) Where's my Licence? My dog ate it
7) Did you see that UFO before? I think it was going a little fast too
8) Me? Speeding? When Pigs drive Cop cars! Oops, sorry, did I offend you porky?
9) Are you feeling down? Do you feel you have to give everyone a ticket? Fear not my friend, my pal Anthony Robbins can help, all you've got to do is believe
10) I'm sorry I was speeding, can I just get my ticket and f*ck off now d*ckhead?

The Best and Worst things to say to your parents when caught searching for Porn

The Best Things:

1) They said they had a hot babe for me!
2) Wow! Would you look at this? These people must be the best Circus performers in the world
3) I was in this website to read the articles
4) They said I had to go
5) The comp just took me there by itself! I had no choice but to find out what this site was
6) No, that's alright Mum, you don't have to know about this
7) Did you know there are over 100000 porn sites on the internet? Here's just one of them
8) This is not a porn site, it's a clothing site
9) They lied to me, they won't stop with the lies!!
10) So yes, there I was, searching for some help for my Homework, when suddenly this woman came on the screen and had a caption saying: "I'll give you a 'hand'"

The Worst Things:


1) "My dog ate it"
2) "Well, I did it, but I think you should go f*ck yourself first"
3) "I marked it myself, and I passed"
4) "Well, I was playing Counter-Strike at 3am, when a Counter-Terrorist bursts through my window and took it!"
5) "I was sleeping!"
6) "It somehow found intself in a flushing toilet"
7) "He's got it" (And then point at someone else)
8) "You never gave me any homework"
9) "Can I have a kiss first?"
10) "Barney said I should believe in myself and I didn't have to do any homework to strengthen my belief in my ability"

this is a spot for nothing, are you gonna argue?

The Best and Worst things to say to a Cop when pulled over for a ticker okey dokey?

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The Worst Things:

1) You were speeding to catch up with me! You get one too, right?
2) Look pal, I've got a gun, a big gun, catch my drift?
3) You idiot! I was under-cover, we were in persuit with a Midget! Oh god, now he's gotten away!
4) Whatever fatty, get another donut into ya before you lose the taste of sugar in your mouth
5) Are you discriminating me because I'm black?
6) Is this fate that we met like this?
7) My Licence is in my pants, get it yourself
8) Speeding my ass! At least I didn't kill anyone like you have!
9) I'm sorry I was speeding, I was too drunk to know otherwise
10) Put it on my tab, tubby

The Best and Worst things to say to an Alien while being abducted this message is so secret you have to highlight it

The Worst Things:

1) Do you mind?! This is private!
2) You think that's porn? Oh you old people, this is a chatroom!
3) Oh Mum, glad you're here, this is my German Internet Girlfriend, meet, Helga
4) Don't say it! This is a food ordering place....no, that's a banana
5) It's amazing what these people can do, don;t you think?
6) Yes, this is porn, and no, I don't care what you think
7) Oh Mum, can I use your Credit Card?
8) I'm ordering a blow up doll, uh, pool balloon, yes, that's it, pool ballon
9) They said she'll love me!
10) Yes, I am searching for porn, but it was my brother who went here first!